You couldn’t have known.
He hid a monster beneath the tux, behind the smile and the vow to love, honor, and cherish.
You couldn’t have known.
What was to come. The trauma, abuse, torture, and torment wrapped in marriage.
You couldn’t have known.
He was a con man, a deceiver, a magician who could transform between man and monster.
You couldn’t have known.
How he’d twist words and memories until you doubted your sanity. Days without sleep and food until you didn’t know if you were coming or going.
You couldn’t have known.
How he’d pick and prod at all your tender places until you reacted, and he called you the abuser. Accusing you of all the things he does.
You couldn’t have known.
That he would trash you behind your back, how your friends thought you were the problem and what a good man he was to put up with you.
You couldn’t have known.
That no one would believe you.
You couldn’t have known.
That praying, forgiving, loving, turning the other cheek, submitting to him would only incite him to be more controlling and manipulative.
You couldn’t have known.
That what he did is abusive, even though he didn’t hit you or hit you only once.
You couldn’t have known.
That God didn’t expect you to stay. That God doesn’t hate divorce. That God hates abuse more than he hates anything.
You couldn’t have known.
How much God loves you. More than he hates. More than he loves marriage. That more than anything, he wants to heal your broken heart. He wants to sit with you in your pain. To show you who he truly is.
You couldn’t have known.
So, give yourself a break. Don’t beat yourself up because you couldn’t have known.
He knows. And he’s here to pick up the pieces of your heart.